Move over CSI (and CSI Miami and similar spin-offs): there's a new criminamologist* in town... me!I have enrolled myself in forensics, to study the exciting field of criminamology**. I will be able to answer those burning questions you may have regarding if that crap you see on TV is true.
In this class, we get an expert guest speaker to speak on each of the following topics:
Fingerprints
Pathology and the Coroner's Office
Bloodstain Pattern Analysis
Firearms and Ballistics
Toxicology
Forensic Psychiatry
High Technology Crime
DNA
Polygraph
Documents and counterfeiting
In the polygraph class, a fellow classmate is hooked up to the polygraph machine. For toxicology, student volunteers booze it up before class... to find out their blood alcohol levels, I assume. I am assured that there are no similar demonstrative aspects to the firearms or bloodstain pattern classes...
Why aren't all my classes this interesting?
* totally different from "criminologist". Criminamologists wear jauntier hats and knit.
** totally different from "criminology". Criminamologists booze it up and go to classes. And knit.
3 comments:
Does that make me a Criminamologist too? You forgot to mention the strangely sexy professor. Bloodsplatter analysis and sexy bald men...Who knew law could be so much fun!
**posting as anonymous in case said sexy bald man uses forensic abilities and seeks out this blog
Kate (D'oh!)
Can interested students audit the blood spatter lecture???
LB
Adie, catching criminals is a lot more fun than defending or even prosecuting them. You can change horses in your career. I'll buy you a wedding dress and an old trechcoat(a la Columbo). Besides everyone knows your mind has a criminal bend in it. It came with the head. Love, R.B.
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